Banana of calming, plus 10 to calmness.
best way to learn a subject. i couldn’t do it more than a few years. imagine gradeschool math for 20 years with screaming kids. no thanks
Oh yeah, the parents are almost as feral as the kids these days.
Unless, and hear me out, they beat that child with multiple bananas at home for 6 straight hours. I mean they pelt him non stop with those large, hard, and un-ripe South American bananas that are like 2lbs of concrete. Then they send him to school with one of those things in his backpack to induce trauma to be a better human.
Ahh, child abuse to ensure compliance. I like it.
“Calming Banana” actually sounds like a great band name. Seriously!
Took those Snickers ads way too seriously
I wonder if they saw the ad and thought “a Snickers a day will get expensive, we’ll give him a banana instead”.
After all, it’s just a banana. How much can it possibly cost? Ten dollars?
There’s always calmness in the banana stand.
Except during that time before Christmas.
In a situation like this is it better to punch the kid or the parents?
Yes.
Jumping uppercut ala Ryu in Streetfighter
The Rising Dragon Fist, AKA “Shooooooryuken!”
You sound angry. How about eating a nice banana instead?
Bananas piss me off.
Have you tried putting them in the other end?
Do you just never know the size of anything?
Punch the parent and they might learn how to help their kid learn better.
Hey! This is the internet, someone will suggest to play safe, take a swing at all three.
I know I sound old, but I miss the days when I (or even my kids) went to school. If a teacher reached out to parents you knew troubles where waiting at home. Not like being beaten senseless, but a punishment was lurking in your near future which would match your wrong doing.
People will do anything but seek out a therapist. The kid may have a behavioral disorder, and seeking referrals for conduct disorder or something is usually a joint effort since parents get defensive even when such a disorder is often biological, like depression.
Or, y’know, zero tolerance bullshit and the kid gets expelled. That’s more common in the US.
Expelled? If they’re Black we just send them right to prison!
Sadly this isn’t a joke
Yes, depending on the age and if police are on campus. Police tend to be permanent on some campuses for “security” but schools with them statistically show a much higher rate of incarceration. Although expulsion is also a fast track to prison, too.
Unsurprisingly, police tend to be in predominantly black schools, although even in desegregated schools (for which there are very few), it’s black students most likely to get in trouble for acting out. Socioeconomic status accounts for some of this, though.
If this is the US, ain’t nobody can afford a therapist now.
They chose that.
How.
No, really. Specifically tell us all here how “they chose that”.
By fucking the economy so hard they most people live paycheck to paycheck, no savings, and since there’s no universal healthcare people need to pay therapy from money they don’t have.
This is by design, keep the poor poor so they don’t learn enough and get enough resources to change things. Things like fair pay and healthcare cost a lot to industries that pay lobbyists.
If the current status is costing the government more than universal healthcare, who is pocketing the difference? Hospitals, insurance companies.
Yeah, “they choose that”. “They” being the industries that pay lobbyists to make sure that “that” keeps happening, and “that” being US citizens not being able to afford therapy, in between other things.
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You missed my last paragraph. “They” does not include you, it only includes the industries that benefit from this status quo. Voting is irrelevant for this matter. Did you read my comment? I never mentioned voting.
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By voting against their own interests for decades.
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Are you talking about the US, or elsewhere?
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People will do anything but seek out a therapist.
Bananas are a lot more affordable (for now).
Does Venezuela produce bananas?
My sister in law and her husband are these people.
She had a kid in high school was non-verbal autistic that she gave up for adoption and ignored. Her first son with her husband was definitely on the spectrum and struggled hard in social situations and in school. School actually pushed for the diagnosis, but there were the “no way. Not my kid.” Kind of people. And did nothing.
Their second kid came along and hes further along the spectrum than their other kid. He’s 6 and still not potty trained and barely talking. My 4 year old passed him developmentally a year or more ago, which seems to have been the catalyst for them to seek help.
Both kids are doing better no that theyre seeing specialist and on development plans with the school. I just cant believe they waited so long… especially because her brother has a son who is also non verbal autistic, and his parents got him diagnosed before i even knew you could see those traits in children
I work at a school and I received training that explicitly told us zero tolerance does not work, made me do a double take. So in at least the northern states things are changing for the better.
Yup, I teach at University in California and get to cite that. It’s a little counter intuitive for people, but it’s true and much better for teachers to understand. I imagine some places ignore data, though.
I mean, that depends on the age. If that kid is 7 or older, yeah, you should probably look into therapy to figure out where that behavior is coming from. 5 or 6, well, kids are still developing emotional regulation at that point. I’m not saying the reaction should be, “OK, we packed a banana,” but probably something more like, “Oh no, I’m so sorry, we’re going to have a talk about how it’s never OK to hit, have you witnessed this kind of behavior before?” then offer to pay for the glasses. (Also, packing a banana isn’t a bad idea, as well as making sure he’s getting enough sleep. 9 times out of 10, when young kid gets disregulated, they’re over-tired or hungry).
I’m here thinking people are so quick to insist on therapy. We don’t even know if they’ve tried to discipline their child like a normal parent should.
In many ways, bad parenting is often why people go to therapy in the first place, haha. That said, I’m referring to something unrelated to parenting, as there are an assortment of disorders that have little to do with parenting.
Also, discipline is tricky; parents have to use more than punishment in their toolbox, like praise for good work, modeling kindness, etc., and avoid modeling physical punishment since that tends to be the main reason a kid hit other kids… although I doubt the banana parents hit their kids.
Screening can help identify the cause of problematic behavior. In the US, that legally is required by the schools in federal law (i.e. IDEA), but obviously enforcing said law isn’t happening, even in better administrations.
Screening can help identify the cause of problematic behavior.
It’s the school. There’s no mystery here.
It’s kind of amazing how nobody suspects the teacher or the school when they’re the most obvious culprits in ruining the lives of children.
Man it’s hard to teach non-violence in an age of violence and emotional deregulation.
“it is very unfortunate that our Jaeydighn used the calming banana as a weapon but we believe it’s important for him to express himself freely and from now on we will peel it in an effort to make the impact softer for everyone involved.”
If you need a calming banana to not punch people not mistreating you in the face you are a garbage person
SOMEONE didn’t get their calming banana!
There aren’t enough calming bananas in the universe in 2026
Lol true
not mistreating you
You think this kid chose to be in school? It’s violent coercion from the start.
It’s a child, calm down lol
This “child” could be 7 or 17, which makes a huge difference regarding the appropriateness of their response. We need more context.
Are you saying that there is enough info to call this child a “garbage person” though lol?
Nah, even as a child that’s unacceptable. My kid is only 5 and I don’t let them hit people, and punish them when they do. The response from the parent shows the apple fell straight down
Edit: if you think this is advocating violence against children, go touch grass or read a single book on parenting ffs. Natural/logical consequences make good punishments for misbehavior, and have gone a long way to helping my kid not act out (and are nonviolent, since that has to be spelled out)
No! Bad! No hitting children!
Punishing is much more than violence against children, and hitting them is one of the worst ways to punish for many reasons.
How about threaten to hit them with gestures?
Or maybe you talk to the kid and take away a privilege they have temporarily that is (at least close to) a natural consequence of behavior? But then again, I’m just a parent of a relatively well adjusted kid who isn’t violent and talks to me about their problems, so what the fuck do I know?
Man, the amount of people who default “punishment” to “violence against kids” is fucking stupid.
But it’ll get you upvotes on Lemmy apparently.
Show us on the thread where anyone advocated for hitting the kid? All I see is people assuming parents are going to hit the kid.
I never said it was acceptable. Do you call you’re children garbage when they misbehave? Does their behavior improve after you tell your child that you think they’re garbage? I don’t let my children hit anyone either, I just don’t call them garbage if they do.
Normal people don’t break the teachers glasses and punch them in the face. This is already major behavioral problems if your kids are school age and doing this.
Totally agree. But, normal people also don’t go around calling children garbage either.
As someone who was a child and therefore interacted with thousands of other children in public school I can confirm some children are garbage. Do you not remember school? Were all of those people ok?
I remember troubled kids that didn’t know how to handle what they where dealing with at home and internally. I don’t remember any garbage kids, no. The idea that a child was just born garbage is just cruel, I hope one day you can learn to forgive and let go of that hate inside.
only 5… punish them
Sounds real normal and healthy. jfc. Who upvotes this trash?
It IS normal to punish 5 year olds. You don’t have to use violence to punish them. 5 years old is enough to understand consequences.
People who think you should teach kids not to hit people. And people who have enough braincells to rub together to understand that punishment and violence against children aren’t the same thing.
Yeah, it’s unacceptable, but it’s also unacceptable to call a child a “garbage person” for acting like a child.
I wouldn’t call a particular kid a garbage person to or around that kid in consideration for the effect it might have on that kid. Between you and me kids who do that are a fucked up mess who probably aren’t going to end well.
Regardless of the labelling, punching someone in the face is absolutely not “acting like a child”, it’s acting like a garbage person. That shit should not be tolerated or excused away to complain about labelling.
And honestly, excusing away a kid battering their teacher as “acting like a child” is pretty goddamned unacceptable too.
My little brother threw a chair at his preschool teacher. This is absolutely shit kids do, that they need to be taught is unacceptable. You don’t teach kids to be better by writing them off as garbage humans, because they’re still learning.
If you call your five year old garbage for acting out, you’re a shitty parent.
How old is your little brother and how is his life going? If its going well I’m pretty sure it involved some intensive parenting or counseling.
I’m always amazed at how little reading comprehension people have, or how they end up responding to things in their own head.
1 - your example of your little brother acting like an asshole doesn’t mean it’s “shit that kids do”. This is “boys will be boys” shit, and that’s not acceptable. This is like saying your little brother throws rocks at moving cars or at animals and it’s just “shit kids do”. Misbehaving kids do it, and need to be taught better, but it is not normal kid behavior.
2 - no one is saying they’re talking to the kid like that
3 - part of teaching kids to be better people is showing them there are natural consequences for their actions, which guess what? That’s a form of punishment, and it isn’t violence.
If you call your five year old garbage for acting out, you’re a shitty parent.
I ask my kid what’s wrong and work with them to find a solution, and implement natural/logical (and because crayons are needed, non violent) consequences for their misbehavior. I may use choice descriptors for their behavior when they are not in the house, but I would never speak to my kid that way.
It baffles me how many people in this thread don’t have a concept of natural/logical consequences as punishment, and it really fucking shows in the responses. But I guess when you’re raised with violence and can’t be bothered to look into alternatives, it’s easy to assume and drag people on the Internet
Who in this thread advocated violence? I advocated selling the kids console to buy the teachers glasses and not getting him another one.
It’s amazing that you complain about people not reading and responding to stuff in their head, then you turn around it do it yourself.
1: I quite clearly stated that this was inappropriate behavior that needs to be educated away. I don’t know how you think my example is condoning the action. Children need to be taught to keep their hands to themselves, this is a normal part of child development. It is normal for children to have Big Emotions and not know how to use their words yet. Normal doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be addressed, it just means that every child has to have it addressed.
2: Have you not read the rest of the thread? Starting with the post calling the child a garbage person?
3: I never said anything to the contrary?
but I would never speak to my kid that way.
Then why are you defending it so hard?
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You can call a kid being a garbage person a garbage person. Doesn’t mean you won’t help them and correct the behavior.
If you call your five year old garbage
It’s not enough to call them names. You gotta punish them! Didn’t you see the other comments? \s
What about the state locking kids in a room all day? Tolerated or no?
Sure, why not. Because all punishment is the job of the state, and no parent has the capability to punish their kid without violence, clearly.
/S for those who can’t realize punishment and violence are not synonymous
Garbage adults start as garbage children
I dunno about that. Usually kids start out great until garbage adults get a hold of them, and then all bets are off.
Yeah that’s what zios and nazis say about murdering children.
Okay, a garbage child then.
People are just violent apes until you raise them to be civilized.
5 year old me would never have punched a teacher just trying to teach the class
How do we know the child’s age? 5yo me was super mad at the world (neurodiverse in 1980s).
This is how children are treated. They’re completely controlled, disempowered, and then hated. It’s completely normalized.
You shouldn’t be in charge of anything. That’s called being complacent and leads to even worse problems.
Because I don’t call children garbage? OK lol
As student services this year: two broken pairs of glasses, one broken finger, laceration to my face from flying objects, sexual assault (breast bitten, fingers rammed into my junk) among the more memorable. I spent the holidays limping from being knocked into a wall. A typical day includes being hit with items, punched, and kicked. I barely notice being physically assaulted or death threats. The SA was mainly notable because it became a dcf call. To be clear, the teacher or peer is the first target and the onus is often on them to protect the peer so they get the worst of it while being paid less.
I wish them all the best, my last day is very soon.
What is a dcf call?
Probably Department of Child and Family Services AKA CPS.
On top of all of this, at least in my country, the pay is shit. And no government past or present seems interested in changing it so…
Always the same story on loop.
“Nobody wants to work anymore” - Because the pay is shit.
“We’re struggling to fill positions” - Because the pay is shit.
"This generation is laz— The. Pay. Is. Shit.I was getting paid more than my teacher friends working in the office being a entry-level data entry person. It sucks how we undervalue teachers.
I’m a teacher assistant, 80% sure I want to go into teaching (students assaulting me isn’t holding me back. Its just the self confidence of stepping up and leading the class is what’s holding me back. And granted, I’m not in the USA, so I don’t fear school shootings)
I’ve had students punch me. I’ve had students slam doors hard enough to break windows. But I also remember seeing the students learn something. The way their face lights up when they are smarter than their friend, or when they make a connection in math. THATS what is bringing me back to the classroom.
The shy kid in yr 8 is now school captain. The kid I personally nicknamed ‘Cartman’ because that was his personality, is helping the new kid around school when teachers aren’t looking.
Remember the good bits
80% sure I want to go into teaching
Judging by the rest of your message, I think you’d be a great teacher, you should become one.
Thank you for the encouraging words. I was going to make a comment about “that’s 4 years of study, just for a maybe I will like it”. But this year (well, this July) marks 4 years of being a Teacher Assistant, and I’m still ready for another 4 years…
All the signs say “go for it”, but the leadership…
The decision is yours to make after all, and it’s a pretty important one. But I think any educational system (wherever you’re from, doesn’t matter) can always use more teachers that actually care for their students and aren’t there just to have a job, which isn’t always the case unfortunately.
the self confidence of stepping up and leading the class is what’s holding me back
You get used to it, especially after a few times of going through and refining your material. Once you have a clearer vision of the outcome you want a class to have, it’s a lot easier to figure out how you can guide groups of students to that point, even if the group dynamics change from year to year.
The kid I personally nicknamed ‘Cartman’ because that was his personality, is helping the new kid around school when teachers aren’t looking.
Should we be worried that Cartman is helping other kids, or is that a sign that he really grew and matured as a person?
Unless it’s done by someone adult with MAGA hat, why would helping a kid be a red flag?
From a kid nicknamed “Cartman”…?
Oh… no reason.
You’re a beautiful human beeing.
Wife used to be a teacher. Key word USED to.
Had a student who regularly threatened to kill her and destroyed her classroom at least twice a week. She would have to clear all the students into the hall while he went on a rampage in there.
The AP would just come down and give him video games to “calm him down”. Guess who learned to freak out for rewards?
It’s almost like kids don’t like being physically coerced into a prison for their whole day.
Yup, kids should never be coerced into doing anything they don’t like. They know best.
thank you
This specific child was being neglected at home. He clearly felt that school was the only place he could exert control without being hit for it.
The solution is obvious
Can you point it out for a dumbass?
Call in ICE and say the kid is an illegal Mexican
Lol
Surely the designer put it up as a prank.
Graphic designers do this crap all the time. I’ve got an aviation textbook with three meshed gears on the cover:
Is there a community for like these “looks/sounds great until you think about it for two seconds” style art/news/media fails? Because I feel like it would be fun time.
Don’t know. I suggest threemeshedgears for the title though.
https://lemmy.world/c/ThreeMeshedGears
Welp I made it
Hey that’s not fair, this could have been taken in Europe
Teaching is not Teaching anymore, its doing the job of the breeders these days and raising their kids teaching them decent manners and how not to be a cunt.
Being a teacher is literally like adopting a class full of feral fuckin cats and trying to turn them into decent humans from the POS ipad baby version their parents have created.
Teaching is not Teaching anymore, [its] … teaching them …
This is a miserable take. Either
- parents were historically solely responsible for everything a child received, including instruction, and thus you are in fact already contracting to do part of a parent’s job anyway Or
- raising children was historically a communal responsibility and you are doing what was historically done by the extended community anyway
You have beef with the disparity between the lines for who has responsibility for the child vs who has ultimate authority over the child. And that is fair! But it’s a problem with the current structure of the system, and we don’t need to harken back to some stupid lie about the good old days to justify the current impasse.
- raising children was historically a communal responsibility and you are doing what was historically done by the extended community anyway
US perspective here. The problems I see:
- In many cases, the parents don’t have time to give their child the attention that they need and the “extended community” has shrunk to maybe some extended family like grandparents or aunts/uncles. This is particularly bad for those in poverty and working multiple jobs.
- Existential dread and financial uncertainty for the parents, the child, and the teachers.
- Reduced educational funding - downward pressure on teacher compensation, teachers paying for classroom supplies the school and parents can’t provide.
- Increasingly corporate structure in school districts - a focus on efficiency, metrics, test performance, etc. instead of the much harder to measure intellectual and social growth of the students. See NCLB.
- Massive, rapid-paced social and technological change.
Going back to when one income could support a family and almost everyone had a parent that was at home that they could rely on is not a stupid lie.
The stupid lie is it is the parent’s fault when they both have to work 40+ hours a week (if you even have two parents), take care of the household, help with homework, and deal with the constant curve balls thrown at you by life (car broken down, major sickness, mental disease, dental issues, housing emergency, etc.)
I am lucky to maybe have a hour a day maximum to myself and that is half an hour in the morning and half an hour at night getting ready or going to bed. We are far past the breaking point for the US.
That never fucking existed. There was never a large portion of the population that made enough money for the woman to stay at home, and even when there was enough to apparently make memes about it, it was at most 2 decades.
For real people, women have always worked. In the 1950s, my maternal grandmother ran the general store they owned and lived above while he worked in the factory, and she helped him bale hay on the weekends when it was in season. My paternal grandmother didn’t work, and they were dirt poor. She thought it was a woman’s place to stay at home and they barely kept food on the table and a roof over their heads. They got frequent financial help from her parents.
My husband: His maternal grandmother didn’t work, and the husband had a decent job. And my MiL died bitter because her parents would take all the kids’ incomes as teenagers to support the household/themselves. His paternal grandmother worked and retired from a federal job.
It’s a lie. It was a lie then to keep women suppressed, and it’s a lie now that doesn’t serve you like you think it does. The average American has always worked, and women’s work has always been discounted. The only ones who didn’t work were the wealthy parasite class.
I agree with you that the person I responded to was wrong for dumping on the parents, but everything else is just more grievance politics, but this time from the left.
Seriously. We were middle class wealthy growing up. Mom always worked. When dad was in college, she put him through his degrees. Ran a dry cleaners. When he was a fresh college grad, she did taxes. Still does taxes but is winding down her practice. She picked up bookkeeping reliable enough she ended up being an office manager for a few successful medical and legal practices. Dad ended up retiring when he could no longer work. Physically, not mentally. Mom still works, more for her health than her finances.
Gran, she always worked. She was an RN. Tough as nails, worked prisons because she took the parable of the sheep and goats to heart and was an atheist because the Christians she grew up with didn’t.
Gramgram, she was a cost accountant. Worked her whole adult life. Grumpa was a cost accountant, and when he discovered he was not one for the ladies he taught her his trade so she could make money just as well as he could, then he fucked off to San Francisco. And Gramgram, she looked after the family. Remarried, specifically a worthless lump of flesh who could help pay the bills, but she was the main breadwinner.
My wife, well when we got married she was already outearning me even before I said fuck it let’s play jazz and she said honey you supported my dreams I’ll support yours even though bwahahaha jazz really you couldn’t even be a clown so I’m not sure what your point is
You are passionate but wrong. There was a large portion of society that did this in the past and continue to do so.
In Europe almost 50% of the time children are with one parent or the other. It is very common for one parent to not work or work very little during the first five years of child rearing.
Almost a fourth of US households have a stay at home parent. With over 11 million stay at home parents in the US alone. I have a hard time understanding where you are coming from.
You also seem to confuse the issue of parents making enough to comfortably take a lot of time away from work to raise children and the fact that housework has been traditionally unpaid.
I think as a society we should recognize the need for a parent, particularly during the first five years, to be at home. We shouldn’t be penalizing people for this. Raising children is tough enough without the economic reality that you will be significantly behind your peers if you actually raise your kids.
No wonder birth rates are down. Having kids has become cost prohibitive in a society that tries to squeeze every penny out of people. We have prioritized making money to the detriment of all over raising children. The system in the US in particular is beyond broken.
I am not talking about unpaid housework, nor did I ever mention parental leave from work/ a pause in a career. I am talking about paid work. Running a general store and baling hay is not housework. Most poor women have always worked. I read the autobiography of Grandma Moses a while back. You’d probably label her a housewife, but she worked a dairy farm like a dog for years with her husband to sell milk and butter. If she’s working to make money and provide, she’s not a housewife who is free to spend her energies only tending to the family’s needs. That is a luxury.
Further, when you mention the European stat… Which I’ll take in good faith since there’s no citation… You are confusing the first five years of life (preschool) with the original comment which seemed to be about grade school kids as well as your other comments about helping with homework, etc, that also imply grade school age kids. Maybe I could buy your argument about small children, but not school age children.
My point is not to penalize people who choose/have the financial ability to stay home. My point is that it was only really ever economy viable for the wealthier people. For the left to sit around and demand it makes them seem as coddled and out of touch as when they demanded student loan repayment. You are asking for subsidized luxury goods on the backs of people who can barely provide food and shelter for themselves. And maybe you think the whole system should be restructured for the wealthy to pay for it and/ or for us to cut back on military spending to pay for it, etc. but that’s not what people lead the argument with. They lead with this expensive, privileged demand.
Most poor women did the work they knew how to. This was often housework. It was common for women to do laundry, dishes, and general cleaning for others. This was also work unless we are going to ignore its value.
I totally understand your poor women angle, but a lot of poor mothers lived in poverty without jobs taking care of their family. Sometimes it was by choice and sometimes not. I am not going to stand in moral judgement of women who were dirt poor and stayed with their family.
I get it, your stock was hard workers. They struggled despite working hard. This is pretty common as my mother’s side was literally the Grapes of Wrath because their farm went under during the dustbowl.
I am not sure you understand the struggle of raising children as you stand in judgement to trivialize other’s experiences. My wife stayed at home for several years raising our kids and we survived on one income.
Tens of millions of people who are not wealthy choose to stay at home with their children. 20% of stay home parents are men in the US. People are doing what you deny every single day and making it work.
Society and the wealthy benefit greatly from parents raising kids. The problem with the US it is extremely exploitive taking that value and not giving back with garbage childcare, uncaring employers, inflated housing, insane medical costs, etc.
I think people are crazy to have kids in the US. So that makes me insane I guess.
I am a married working mother of two. Don’t tell me what I don’t understand. I am not trying to uphold my family as some paragon of virtue. They were the most accessible anecdotes I have on hand. My point is women always worked, and the view that they didn’t is just a rewrite of history to erase them and their contributions by conservatives, and now this fake history is being repurposed by liberals as some achievable ideal. Why do you think all the early women’s rights advocates were demanding equal pay for equal work? Because they were working!
I was going to throw out anecdotes about the folks I know now where one parent has stayed home, but it didn’t help to paint the picture of how things “used to be”. But as far as what people I know do, the picture remains that it is largely a luxury of the well-off: in households where I am fairly sure the husband makes >$250k/yr, I think they do/did fine (past tense for the mother’s that still chose to go back once the children were school-aged). They don’t live extravagantly, but there is no hardship. I know a couple where the Dad stays home, unemployed not by choice. The mom makes (I think) between $200k-$250k/yr, and their finances are tight. They are managing, but it’s not great. She actually took an assignment overseas where their money would go further and more expenses would be paid by her company, but this administration ended that opportunity and they are back. The last couple I know, the husband makes maybe $100k, and it is a hardship that she thinks her role is at home and will not work. They are constantly struggling to pay rent, to pay their bills, and to buy vehicles. They frequently seek financial help from everyone they know.
Anyway, go read some Simone de Beauvoir. Historically most people were poor and most women worked. She called the women in the upper class who didn’t work “parasite women”.
Teaching is capitalist babysitting so the kids grow up indoctrinated and so the parents can waste their lives serving capital without the distraction of kids.
