Womensstuff is a trans and enby+ inclusive women’s only community. If you are not one, it’s kindly asked to refrain from posting - thank you :)

So, there’s two parts to this; cramps, and skincare. Boldened questions. Thanks everyone in advance, whether cis, trans, or femby - this place feels welcoming <3


Cramps
Basically, my nonexistent uterus is giving me cramps rn :3

So far I’ve had about a few periods, since starting E, and it’s been both incredibly affirming and aching for me haha. They occur varyingly around once per 20 days to 35 for me.

Currently, i mostly just use a hot water bottle that i put onto my crotch, or I cope with eating quite a bit of chocolate. are there more methods?

I don’t bleed so there’s that. I also don’t think i experience bloating, so i’m curious what that is like?

I seem to usually get a bit of a nausea (but instead of at the stomach, it’s down there), rising and fading with the half hours, and I don’t know if I’m bad at math, but I feel like it can pop up again in a timespan of a few days. It’s also a bit like you press gently with the knuckles against that area. not much beside that, though. Oh, and a little bit grumpy, like when you’re past the ‘stomach is hungry’ phase and start being mildly annoyed. So, all that said…

What methods help well against period symptoms? And out of curiosity, how much does the experience vary between us?


Skincare

Bit of an age old and stereotypical question, but I’m only starting to go into this as a gal.

My skin has been smoother a lot since I started estrogen, and I tend to wash my face with just cold water, putting night cream, and estrogen’s also doing wonders. But I still notice I get pimples on my legs and feel my skin is a bit too ‘oily/fatty, rough’. I’m not sure if the following contributes, but gonna put it out there. I replace pillow covers once every few weeks, don’t eat a lot of greens or fruits, and often eat chocolate, but other than that I don’t eat that unhealthily. I never go to snackbars and eat one/two plates per meal, three meals a day. I take walks everyday and bicycle.

Sure, there’s foundation and concealer. But they hide it artificially and I’d rather think of a ‘natural feel of smooth’ due to lifestyle, rather than created through all sorts of creams and the like.

What would then help best, in getting the skin to feel more soft and look smoother?


Clothing

The northern spring is coming and (far away, but still) summer too. I seem to pass for a lot of people nowadays, though I don’t have this feel yet for myself.

I have long hair, a Roman nose, a sadly masculine though smooth jaw and chin (thanks laser!), getting gentle curves which makes me happy.

I like the idea of skirts, though I would probably tuck until I’ve had surgery. And tucking feels kind of like a reminder to me of the wrong part being there. I don’t mind neutral clothing.

So, what would be some ‘safe’ choices for clothing that could fit either gender for summer, but also maybe make me feel girly enough?

  • dkppunk@piefed.social
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    3
    ·
    edit-2
    9 days ago

    Here is my advice as a cisgender woman who grew up as a tomboy and likes to blur the gender lines.


    Cramps

    What methods help well against period symptoms? And out of curiosity, how much does the experience vary between us?

    I didn’t start getting regular cycles or bad period symptoms until after I was sterilized in my 30s. When I am feeling extra cruddy, I take Tylenol (edit: or preferred pain reliever) and simethicone (GasX), even if I’m not gassy. Simethicone really only affects gas so taking it even when you don’t have any is not harmful. It’s also part of my regimen when the bunnies have tummy aches and their vet said there is no harm in a little too much.


    Skincare

    What would then help best, in getting the skin to feel more soft and look smoother?

    Sorry, this is one I can’t really help with, my skin is so sensitive that I can’t use lotions often because I can feel even the lightest ones on my skin for hours and I feel greasy.


    Clothing

    So, what would be some ‘safe’ choices for clothing that could fit either gender for summer, but also maybe make me feel girly enough?

    I grew up more of a tomboy and used to not wear dresses or skirts at all, that only changed in my early 30s. As I said above, I like to blur the gender line and I’ve learned what looks more feminine on my body type.

    I realized after typing it all out, that some of these may not be for either gender or what you were looking for, but as you become more comfortable, they may be useful to you or others in the future:

    • Long tunic shirts. These types of shirts can also have a bit of a flare at the bottom, so it gives an almost dress. These may not fit either gender, but once you are comfortable, they give a more feminine look.
    • Long dangly earrings. I have a mohawk (really short hair makes me personally feel more feminine) and I love wearing long dangly earrings. They can dress up a more casual outfit and look very classy. I started buying earrings as souvenirs when I travel and they can be a great conversation starter too.
    • Scarves. These can be used with any gender. I know you were looking for more summer items, but cute lightweight scarves create a more feminine look. I have a couple that are very lightweight/sheer that I pair with a cute top and jeans or a denim jacket and dress. The colors can also be matched with earrings or other small splashes of color in your outfit to make those colors stand out more. These are usually very inexpensive and can be also found at thrift stores.
    • Shoes. Don’t neglect your feet. Cute shoes are great, but there are so many shoes that are uncomfortable or just bad for your feet. Find a style and size that fit well first, because bad shoes can cause a lot of pain up through your body and that builds up as you get older. I am tall, so I don’t wear a lot of heels, but when I do, I prefer a chunky style because they are more stable for my ankles. Heels pump up your legs/calves and give them a more feminine look, but don’t wear them unless they are comfortable. I cannot emphasize enough, do not wear shoes that hurt your feet, they are not worth it no matter how cute they look.
    • Other accessories like jewelry and purses. Finding pieces that match makes a person look more put together. Cute rings, necklaces, or bracelets can be matched to earrings or splashes of color in your outfit, just like scarves. Don’t skip out on accessories.
    • Nail polish. I used to just buy the cheap stuff and it would start peeling after a day or two. I do kind of like the chippy look but that’s just the old punk rock in me. In the last few years, I decided to splurge a bit and buy the next level up, think the $6 polish vs the $2 stuff. I’ll never go back to the cheap stuff again. Since the switch, my polish now lasts about 2 weeks, which actually saves me money because I’m not fixing chips all the time or reapplying more often.
    • birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zoneOP
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      ·
      9 days ago

      thank you so much! Is tylenol a form of paracetamol?

      Scarves are awesome! If it matters, I have a very mild hourglass figure, although shoulders are fairly broad. I already wear a ring, but I def should try out more jewellery.

      I haven’t tried out long tunic shirts before, so I’ll try that!

      Pre-E it was more rectangular/inverted triangle, but the fat seems to be moving from the waist towards the hips, and shoulders less :3

      that is, according to this site (which seems to measure by horizontal width rather than circumference, by the way).

      • dkppunk@piefed.social
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        9 days ago

        Just a caveat, please understand any fashion advice I give comes from a 40+ yo nerdy pinkish mostly wears lounge/jeans and tshirt kind of lady. I did work in women’s fashion retail for a while and I pay attention to trends, even if I don’t participate much. At least my advice is more relevant at this time because young kids are wearing the same things I wore in high school 20+ years ago; Jnco style jeans, tanks, that 2000s style 🤣

        thank you so much! Is tylenol a form of paracetamol?

        Yes, it is. It’s also known as acetaminophen. Most folks will use ibuprofen (Motrin) as an anti-inflammatory or pain reliever. I do not take NSAIDs due to kidney issues. That was more a suggestion on your preferred pain reliever.

        Scarves are awesome! If it matters, I have a very mild hourglass figure, although shoulders are fairly broad. I already wear a ring, but I def should try out more jewellery.

        Scarves are great. Try on a few at a store to make sure they look ok on you. They may bring attention to your shoulders, but it tends to draw more attention to the neck area in my experience. They can also be tied in different knots to bring more attention to that and away from your shoulders.

        I haven’t tried out long tunic shirts before, so I’ll try that!

        Try a few on before purchasing or if you order online, order from somewhere with easy returns, just in case you don’t like them. Depending on the cut (I hate the puffy arm ones), they can make the shoulders look more prominent, but the flair at the bottom tends to balance that out. Here is a picture of one that I have, the one in the top middle. You may have to look around for a style that works with you or is a little more gender neutral as you gain confidence.

        Another option that’s a little more neutral is the tank top with a button up. I do this one in the summer when I want a light layer on my shoulders, paired with jeans or a skirt. I will get cold if air blows over my skin, so I constantly wear layers. Here is an example of that. It may take a bit away from the hourglass shape, but you could do a tighter tank top underneath, which is how I usually style it.