Her boobs boobed boobily
Classic sci fi gets me every time. I distinctly remember a scene from the original Foundation novels. A couple boards their personal interstellar space ship. Their civilization is advanced enough that that’s just a thing. This is a setting with godlike atomic technology, interstellar travel, galactic civilizations, and terrifying psionic powers. And this couple boards their personal star ship.
…At which point the husband directs his wife to make dinner.
The whole Foundation series is written almost without any women in it. But it was written in 1951, by a 32 years old guy so it shows.
Don’t forget the nuclear-powered ashtrays!
Groan. I wonder how many incel types have been sci fi writers
Cassandra woke up to the rays of the sun streaming through the slats on her blinds, cascading over her naked chest. She stretched, her breasts lifting with her arms as she greeted the sun. She rolled out of bed and put on a shirt, her nipples prominently showing through the thin fabric. She breasted boobily to the stairs, and titted downwards.”
Such well rounded prose, my bosom friend.
I really need to start using the word “bosom” more, just to weird people out.
You should, it’s a very woody word.
Ahh, i see you’ve read Heinlein
Brilliant 👏
Where have I heard this one before?
It’s at least a decade old
Not quite: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/breasted-boobily Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply I wrote it myself.
Try size zero but magically with tits, each one bigger than her head but somehow no back problems. And the 45 minute periods would only for the subset of men that know women have periods. But some how women always get 100% pregnant with the slightest bit of sperm with zero understanding that we are not ovulating 24/7
Yes and unrealistically perky! No sagging, stretch marks and no need for a bra with massive thick straps. And when she gets pregnant due to his Mighty Penis, they are both ecstatic about the unplanned pregnancy 🙄
Oh and magically become as tight as a virgin after pushing out the kid; a clearly painless act that just endlessly makes her horny for her husband whom she sucked off while in labor…
Haha mate that made me lol! Filthy but true.
But some how women always get 100% pregnant with the slightest bit of sperm with zero understanding that we are not ovulating 24/7
No no. Obviously the ovulation in the female characters only starts once the male protagonist enters the room!
That last one has more to do with tv tropes I think.
Where if a straight couple loves each other, they obviously must get a child.
Although there are other tropes like what you mention, they aren’t all like that.
It’s definitely possible to be a size zero and have large breasts.
Nah, you forgot the 34D bosom.
Who writes about small heads?
Well, a lot of men write about the breasts as if they’re as big as the woman’s head.
Since in real life, barring some very extreme surgeries, most times, even the largest of breasts tend to be, you know, smaller than the head, it must mean the women being described have unusually small heads.
(This could explain why they’re foolish enough to be in such books, come to think of it.)
Almost all male writers screw up even basic dimensions of women. It’s like they didn’t know that height and weight charts exist so you can come up with plausible measures.
(Also … the fact that numbers are being attached is a dead giveaway that this is a male writer.)
In one hobby I used to partake of, people had to write descriptions of characters. You could almost always spot the male writers. First, attaching actual numbers instead of making comparisons. Second, the ideal body type always came across as a broomstick with beachballs stapled to it.
Reminds me of a tale I heard of a DND campaign. The players kept one-upping each other on their character’s physical dimensions as characters died or were swapped out. And their weights didn’t match. The players didn’t want to estimate realistic weights, as that would make their characters seem fat. Eventually the whole party was composed of these extremely tall yet unrealistically light characters. So the DM responded by having NPCs start treating the whole party like monsters, treating them as if they physically had the proportions the character stats implied. The party kept finding that entire villages would run away from them in terror.
That is BRILLIANT!
And so much for getting clues to what’s happening from the locals! Or selling your loot!
If you stapled a beach ball to something it would deflate
So that’s what causes sagging!
Why it was a chore to drag myself through the Witcher books. I did it to prepare for playing through the game series, but honestly I dont recall much at all beyond what felt like a convoluted, mediocre harem power fantasy with some daddy issues thrown in there
It’s not untrue, though some also get things right. I can’t stop recommending children of time, and I love the way the author dealt with gender. It was a good read regardless, but imho he did a great job writing female characters.
Absolutely, some men are very good at writing about (and even from the perspective of) their female characters.
We call those men “good writers”.
What I think the pattern is that when you see stuff like that, it’s always a male writer doing it. And male editors, in the case of published works, letting it fly.
I agree that it’s mostly men doing it. I was more just looking to shoehorn in that book recommendation lol. I will say some female romantasy authors can kind of go the other way. It’s mostly a bad writer issue in both cases, and at least the female authors didn’t do it in a way that objectifies women for both a primarily male audience and the men in the story.
This kind of gets at the issues I see most bad female authors run into: https://youtu.be/ejklu1OvWFs
They’re different pitfalls, but I’m also a getting a little sick of them too.
Really, I think the authors just get horny when writing fiction sometimes. Which is fine like, once, but if there’s like, three horny passages, I’m like “ok, please give it a rest.”
It’s mostly a problem because some writers are just… bad. I’m reading romantasy, I expect some romance, I take issue when it’s written like not another teen movie and still takes itself seriously.
Only downside is that now I hear some people’s names and can only think of spiders. It’s like how some people have dog names. These people have spider names! (I wish I had a spider name…)
I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone irl with any of the spider names I can remember. I’ve heard of people talk about a Bianca, but never met any. Fabian goes hard in my opinion though. Great name for just about anything lol.
+1 for the Children of Time series! I loved those books!
Oh yes!
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and yet men for the most part remain entirely clueless, it’s enraging that the very standards imposed by patriarchy are not even within the consciousness of men who benefit from them - it is the women who know the standards they must live by, and the men get to live blissfully unaware.
A woman might fret over fluctuating sizes from an XS to a S, while a man might see her and only judge her for being too skinny or too fat or not pretty enough or too pretty without ever knowing what size she is.
I feel ironically the greatest capacity and my biggest fears of judgement come not from men and patriarchs but from women, who see with much greater detail and know the standards better than men - they know my “value” under the calculus of patriarchy better than the patriarchs do.
That’s a really interesting comment Dandelion. Men often can’t tell size differences unless they’re obvious but women are more switched onto it… and can be very harsh. Also good to see you back we’ve missed you
It’s actually a pet peeve of mine when characters are all made super underweight like it’s the default. like being 172 cm/5 foot 8 and 6 and a half stone/95 pounds isn’t normal
Very true. One of my pet peeves is reading about female characters who, unlike other women, don’t wear makeup and spend all their time doing nerdy hobbies only and never do anything at all to take care of their appearance because that’s a waste of time… But their hair is always shiny and bouncy and they are fit and their skin is smoooooth and their boobs are perky (of course they are!) and, most importantly, they always fall for the main character for absolutely no good reason.
The perfect hair and makeup ruins every zombie movie for me. Like, you’ve been camped out for three days in an abandoned warehouse surrounded by undead. But your hair is immaculate!
And their ‘armor’ is just a metal bikini.
Yep! Bonus points if there’s a small but aesthetically pleasing smudge of paint oh her face
And she thinks it’s endearing when the main character touches her face to wipe it away, despite not knowing him, or inviting him to touch her. She has no boundaries.
Of course not! Indeed she feels a jolt of electricity go through her at his manly touch.
Ironically, I know a trans man for whom a lot of that was actually true. Until he started T, his skin was crystal clear (smooth as silk, if you don’t count body hair), looked amazing without makeup, and even today he still has the perkiest tits I’ve ever seen. Talk about a waste - I know women who would kill for tits half as perky as his, and they’re utterly wasted on a dude.
i have seen this character in a lot of video games, though instead of a translucent top she wears boob armor, a crotchplate, and battle heels. <.<
Hey mate! Thanks for stopping by and doing it in a nice manner. We are a trans+ inclusive women only community so please don’t comment again. Thanks for understanding 🥰
Hi, curious, what made you believe that Amazing does not fit your community criteria?
He said he’s a man
That is a very strong indicator of someone who identifies as male, yes.
Yes it was a bit of a clue.
Bold of you to assume they even write female characters, save for one token woman that is some mix between Smurfina and Virgin Mary.
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Ye Olde Chainmail Bikini.